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MY SON, SPD, AND ME

This is only my personal experience and should not be construed as advice, but I need to tell you about my son…

I have been blessed to have been given the most amazing child so late in life. My wonderful wife delivered on our son’s due date without complication. I held our miracle thinking “what am I supposed to do with you?” I was terrified that at 41, I was already past my prime to be a father.

As our son grew, we noticed that things were “different.” He was lifting his head faster than normal and adapting to new experiences immediately. When he first stood up on his own, it was on my birthday when he was only five months old. Then he began to use furniture to help him walk around. We thought “look at our clever boy go!”

At his two-year-old yearly checkup, his pediatrician told us that we had a child who is intellectually gifted and we need to explore all possibilities to nurture this. At the same time, we also were experiencing things that deeply troubled him. He was uncoordinated; he could not look into our eyes when we spoke to him; sounds and textures caused him great pain; he was shyer than other children his age. Our concerns led us to seek help. He was diagnosed with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). What this means for him is that his senses become overwhelming due to his environment.

This is what my miracle has to deal with in life. I wondered, how do you nurture a gift that he has, while trying to protect him from the painful world around him? After months of intensive research, my wife found the answer – homeschooling. As long as we can contain and control the environment around him, we can also help that little brain blossom.

At the age of three, our son began his educational journey. It all started with an amazing online Preschool curriculum that consisted of 84 lessons to complete. I thought “Wow, what a challenge!” I was wrong. Six weeks later, he was finished. This was no fluke; we knew he had something beyond even us. My wife prepared him well for the move to Kindergarten, this time with a traditional curriculum along with his first nationally standardized end-of-year exam as North Carolina General Statute § 115C-564 requires. After doing fabulous in school, we selected the IOWA Test; he scored in the 99 percentile of all children in the United States.

As our son continued to develop, so too did his sensory issues. We later discovered that because his eye sight was still developing while he was learning to walk, it disturbed the development of his hand-eye coordination and depth perception, thus adding to the disorder. Fortunately, one thing that did change for the better was his social skills. He became a social butterfly. He became a natural leader and has had places where he can visit where he thrives from the social interaction.

As his SPD has worsened, he will begin occupational therapy soon to hopefully find relief. Yet, every day he continues to smile, laugh, and have fun as any four-year-old should. By the way, he’s in first grade now. We do our best to give him a balanced life. He has learned to be humble, kind, and a gentleman; a quality sorely lacking nowadays. I know that the challenges awaiting my son will be chaotic over the next several years, but I also know that he has a solid support system in family, godparents and friends who are always by his side. My son has taught me that SPD and other challenges in life do not define who he is, nor limit his capabilities; he says that it is what he has and not who he is. For parents and children going through your own battles, my son has a message for you– “being unique is my super power and it is yours too.”

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