What’s the Problem with Social Distancing? It’s Already Our Way of Life

Over the past two weeks we’ve been encouraged to practice social distancing, a conscious effort to maintain space between yourself and other people.

We’ve been urged not to gather in groups greater than 500, then 250, then 50, then 25 and now 10 and to stay at least six feet away from one another. Despite this charge being for our own health, there has been some very public rebellion to the idea.

We’ve seen live posts to social media of people out and about socializing, the beaches in Florida are still packed with people soaking up the sun and splashing in the waves, and cities are laced with lines of people wrapping around corners outside of bars, restaurants and stores. Local governments have had to limit restaurants to serving take-out only and, in some areas, many stores have closed indefinitely as drastic measures to keep people apart.

It’s said that social distancing is a challenge because people have an innate need to connect with others and that limiting that contact may negatively impact our psychological well-being. But, I’d argue that we started practicing social distancing long before the coronavirus (COVID-19) became a pandemic. We’ve been socially distancing for decades.

Take a moment to think about the interactions you have in a typical day. Be sure to include every mode of communication that you use and every connection you make with another person. Now ask yourself, what percentage of those interactions are in person? How many are with a live person? How many are virtual or electronic? How many require an actual person-to-person connection?

Chances are the majority of your social interactions on a typical day are socially distant. If you’re like most people, emails, text messages and IMs far outweigh physical connections and, if you add in communication through social media and television, you were more distant from social interaction two months ago than you are today.

The only difference between then and now is then it was by choice, today we’re being  told to distance ourselves and, here in America, we don’t like it. In America, we are used to having an opinion and freedom of choice and the feeling of losing that freedom can be a great challenge. However, as mentioned earlier, social distancing is not a new concept, it’s really already our way of life.

Yesterday I read an article about a popular streaming service offering a way to connect with other subscribers, so you can stream together simultaneously as if you are watching the movie or show together. This service is offered through an app which includes a chat feature, so you can live chat with whoever you’re watching with from afar.

As an adult that lives alone, my first thought was “what a great idea”; when I remembered that most adults do not live alone that thought quickly changed to “are we really this far gone?” Is it really necessary to connect with people in a different place when there’s likely people in the house with you? Schools nationwide are closed and many of us are working from home or are just home because our jobs are closed. For most people this means there is someone at home with you that can watch along with you but, unfortunately, our chronic social distancing has overshadowed that fact.

We’ve become accustomed to interacting with people we can’t see and those interactions supersede the relationships in front of us. It’s a sad reality yet our reality none the less and the recent charge for social distancing had made this glaringly clear.  

Think about how often you see people together and one of them (or all of them) is looking down at their phone “connecting” with others while ignoring those right in front of them. Consider the times you’ve had virtual conversations with someone only to struggle for things to say when you see them face-to-face (I know it can’t just be me).

Look up from this article and look around you, is there someone else there in the room who is more interested in what they see as they scroll than the conversation they could have with you right now? Chances are there is someone in the room and my hope is that you put down whatever device you are using to read this and engage with them.

Take this time of social distance from the outside world to socially reconnect with the people right in front of you. Your children, your spouse, your loved ones; the people that you work hard to support yet who often get the least of your time, energy and attention because you have so little left to give after a long day of work. This is our time to bond with the people who matter most, to reignite flames of interest that have been dampened by the daily trials of life, to reestablish the passion we once had and to regain control of the lives that we live every day.

Right now we should be having the conversations we’ve been putting off, we should ask the questions that have been burning in our minds, we should share the joys we never have time to share because outside life demands that we make it a priority. Don’t let this time pass by without taking advantage of it. Besides, it’ll go much faster if we make the most of it. Happy connecting!