By Jessica Barfield Graham
“Sticks and Stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.”
This is what I whispered to myself as a middle-schooler. Little did I know I would be saying this to myself at the peak of my career as an adult.
Why you ask would I say this?
I was a victim of workplace bullying. Now, I know some of you, may think “how can you possibly be bullied as an adult?” This is how…
We all believe that when we leave school, bullying will no longer exist. That is so untrue! I have listened to several of my family and friends express their frustration about the unfair treatments they’ve experienced from a coworker, supervisor or superior.
A 2017 survey by the Workplace Bullying Institute estimated that 61 percent of U.S. employees are aware of abusive conduct in the workplace; 19 percent have experienced it and another 19 percent have witnessed it.
So I know you are thinking… What is Workplace Bullying?
Bullying is legally defined as unwanted behavior that occurs over a period of time and is meant to harm someone who feels powerless to respond. However, since there is not a legal definition for Workplace bullying, workplace bullying is defined as “offensive, intimidating, malicious or insulting behavior, an abuse or misuse of power through means that undermine, humiliate, denigrate or injure the person being bullied.”
For example, if your boss and/or coworker demonstrates:
- Overbearing supervision;
- Constant criticism;
- Blocking promotion;
- Exclusion, for example from lunches and drinks, relevant meetings, and important emails;
- Being overworked and expecting unreasonable response times;
- Making threats or comments about job security without foundation;
- Such as Threaten you by saying “If you report me, you will be fired!”;
- Yelling or humiliating you;
- Belittles your character or spread rumors about you;
- Sabotages your work.
If this is something you have been experiencing; then you should seek help.
In situation such as this, you should speak to someone that you can trust such as a friend or a family member.; even a coworker that you can trust.
You should first decide if you can speak directly to the one who is bullying you. Believe it or not, sometimes they are unaware of how they are coming off to their team. However, if that does not work, you should report them to Human Resources (HR) and file for a formal grievance.
A formal grievance should force your employer to investigate the matter. An employer should have a grievance policy that explains how the process works. Usually, the grievance is lodged with HR or your manager (unless your manager is the bully, in which case, if possible, you should lodge it with someone who holds more seniority). To help the case, you must document everything. The more proof the better the chance to solve the case.
If the grievance is not upheld, you have the right to lodge an appeal. If it is upheld, the person bullying you could be disciplined or even dismissed.
As the old saying goes, “Stick and Stone may break my bones but words will never hurt me.” That statement is totally false! Words do hurt! In fact, it can cause people stress, PTSD and other issues such as:
- Hypertension;
- Auto-immune disorders;
- Depression;
- Anxiety;
- Suicide.
According to the 1974 Health and Safety Act, it is the employer’s responsibility to protect the well-being of their employees. An unhealthy work environment stresses all employees; not just the target, and increases the rate of physical and emotional illnesses.
If you are witnessing someone being bullied at work, please do your part and report it. If you don’t, then you become part of the problem.
